Episode 151
151 - The Hidden Link Between Alcohol and Anger
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
Have you ever poured a drink to unwind, only to find yourself angrier than before? In this eye-opening episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores the often misunderstood connection between alcohol and anger.
Whether you're a casual drinker or someone who struggles with outbursts after a night out, this episode offers clarity, compassion, and a practical path forward.
Key Takeaways:
-Alcohol lowers your inhibitions and impairs judgment, making you more likely to lash out in anger
-If you already have unresolved anger, alcohol can act like gasoline on a fire — intensifying aggression and conflict
-Drinking doesn’t cause abusive behavior, but it does magnify emotions that are already beneath the surface.
Recognising your personal limits and planning ahead can help prevent alcohol-fueled arguments
-If drinking regularly leads to regret or outbursts, it may be time to reconsider its role in your life.
-True change comes from looking inward — at the beliefs, habits and triggers that drive your anger — not just cutting back on alcohol.
Links referenced in this episode:
angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management
angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Control Your Anger in 7 Days
angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System
Transcript
Think about the last time you poured yourself a drink to take the edge off.
Speaker A:Maybe it was after a stressful day at work.
Speaker A:Maybe it was after an argument at home.
Speaker A:Or maybe it was just to feel a little lighter, a little less weighed down.
Speaker A:But here's the hard question.
Speaker A:What happens when that drink doesn't calm you down, but fuels the very anger you were trying to escape?
Speaker A:For thousands of men and women I've worked with, alcohol hasn't just been a drink in the glass.
Speaker A:It's been gasoline poured on the fire of anger.
Speaker A:If you've ever felt that shift inside you from relaxed to reactive, from social to short tempered, then this episode matters.
Speaker A:Because alcohol and anger are connected in ways which most people don't understand.
Speaker A:And until you face that connection, you may stay stuck in a cycle of outbursts, regret, and denial.
Speaker A:The fact that you're here today says something powerful about you.
Speaker A:It means you're willing to face a difficult truth.
Speaker A:And that courage is the first step toward change.
Speaker A:So stay with me, because by the end of this episode, you'll understand the truth about alcohol and anger, why they're such a dangerous mix, what alcohol does not cause, and most importantly, how you can break free from the cycle.
Speaker A:Starting right now.
Speaker A:Hello and welcome to episode 151 of the Anger Secrets podcast.
Speaker A:I'm your host, Alistair Dewes, and for over 30 years, I've taught thousands of men and women who, just like you, wanted to control their anger, take responsibility for their actions, and build calmer, happier and more loving relationships.
Speaker A:If you want help right now to manage your anger, including a powerful live training on how to break the anger cycle, head over to my website, angasecrets.com there's a link there.
Speaker A:To access that live training or if you'd like to chat personally with me about your situation, you can also book a free 30 minute anger assessment.
Speaker A:Call with me.
Speaker A:I look forward to talking with you.
Speaker A:Okay, with that said, let's dive into today's episode, the Truth about Alcohol and Anger.
Speaker A:Let's start with how alcohol affects you physically.
Speaker A:As you may know, alcohol is a depressant.
Speaker A:It slows down your nervous system and affects your brain function.
Speaker A:That's why many people feel more relaxed, more social, or even more confident after drinking.
Speaker A:Alcohol has a sedative effect, but while drinking may take the edge off at first, it also intensifies negative emotions like anger, aggression, and irritability.
Speaker A:So why is this?
Speaker A:It is because alcohol lowers your inhibitions and makes it harder to control your impulses and your reactions.
Speaker A:Alcohol also impacts Your prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain responsible for decision making, self control and regulating emotions.
Speaker A:When alcohol is in your system, your ability to think clearly and keep calm is impaired.
Speaker A:Now, not everyone who drinks becomes angry or aggressive, but if you already struggle with anger, alcohol can act as a trigger, turning small sparks into explosions.
Speaker A:Having said this, how exactly does alcohol connect to anger?
Speaker A:For most people, the biggest factor is lowered inhibitions.
Speaker A:When you've been drinking, you're more likely to act on your anger quickly and aggressively, in ways you might never do if you were sober.
Speaker A:That can lead to words or actions you regret almost instantly.
Speaker A:Alcohol also distorts your perception.
Speaker A:It makes you more likely to misinterpret what someone says, to see insults where none were intended, or to escalate conflicts that could have been resolved peacefully.
Speaker A:And finally, alcohol also interferes with communication.
Speaker A:Your judgment, tone and ability to listen all get clouded.
Speaker A:Misunderstandings pile up, tempers flare.
Speaker A:And what might have been a small disagreement can spiral into something much bigger.
Speaker A:Now, you may know all of this, but what can you do if you have an issue with anger when you are drinking?
Speaker A:Firstly, it is important to know your limits.
Speaker A:If you've noticed that a certain level of alcohol makes your temper rise, then set a firm boundary for yourself.
Speaker A:For some people, that might mean one or two beers instead of a dozen.
Speaker A:For others, it may mean avoiding certain spirits, like whiskey or tequila, that hit harder emotionally.
Speaker A:Secondly, make a plan for handling potential anger triggers before you drink.
Speaker A:This might mean stepping away when you feel frustration rising, taking a few deep breaths and counting to 10, or surrounding yourself with trusted friends or family who can help you stay calm if things get heated.
Speaker A:Finally, if you know your drinking has led to angry outbursts in the past, it may be worth asking a bigger Is alcohol helping me live the life I want?
Speaker A:For some people, the healthiest choice is to give it up entirely.
Speaker A:If you're considering that, I encourage you to reach out to a professional who can support you in making that change and sticking with it.
Speaker A:Next, let's discuss a question I hear.
Speaker A:Does alcohol cause abuse or violence?
Speaker A:Despite everything I've just said, the short answer to this question is no.
Speaker A:Alcohol doesn't cause abusive or violent behaviour.
Speaker A:It doesn't plant anger inside you that wasn't there before.
Speaker A:What it does is amplify emotions and thoughts that are already present.
Speaker A:So if someone already has a tendency to be aggressive, alcohol makes those tendencies stronger.
Speaker A:If someone is generally calm and respectful while sober, alcohol is unlikely to turn them violent.
Speaker A:This is why it's so important not to blame alcohol itself for angry or abusive behaviour.
Speaker A:The real cause lies in your thoughts, beliefs and learned patterns.
Speaker A:To truly address anger, you must look at and change those deeper drivers, not just the alcohol.
Speaker A:Okay, to sum all this up.
Speaker A:Excessive drinking can have a powerful effect on your anger and emotional control.
Speaker A:It lowers inhibitions, clouds judgment, and fuels negative emotions.
Speaker A:But alcohol itself is not the root cause of anger, abuse or violence.
Speaker A:It only magnifies what's already there.
Speaker A:So if you know that alcohol tends to make your anger worse, the simplest step you can take is to reduce or even eliminate your drinking.
Speaker A:And if that feels like a big step, seek professional help.
Speaker A:There's no shame in asking for support.
Speaker A:And above all, remember that change of any type is a journey.
Speaker A:It takes practice, patience and self awareness.
Speaker A:Keep going, keep working on yourself and reach out for help when you need it.
Speaker A:Do that and you'll be well on your way to building the calmer, happier and more respectful life you deserve.
Speaker A:Okay, that's it for today's episode, the Truth About Anger and Alcohol.
Speaker A:If this episode was helpful for you, hit that follow button and maybe leave a quick review.
Speaker A:It helps others find the podcast and it might be the exact thing someone else needs to hear today.
Speaker A:Also, don't forget to share this episode with a friend or loved one who might benefit from it.
Speaker A:Together we can create a calmer, happier world and help each other grow.
Speaker A:And if you're ready to get serious about changing how you show up in your relationship, take a look at the complete anger management system@AngerSecrets.com course.
Speaker A:And finally, remember, you can't control what other people say or do, but you can control yourself.
Speaker A:And that's where your real power lives.
Speaker A:Take care and I'll talk to you soon.
Speaker B:The Anger Secrets podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of counseling, psychotherapy or any other professional health service.
Speaker B:No therapeutic relationship is implied or created by this podcast.
Speaker B:If you have mental health concerns of any type, please seek out the help of a local mental health professional.
