Episode 139
139 - Can People Really Change? The Truth About Anger Management
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs dives into the idea that real change in anger management is possible, even if it feels like nothing works. By the end of the episode, listeners will understand that anger management is a skill that can be learned, not just a trait they are stuck with.
Alastair also emphasises that with the right tools and support, transformation is achievable, and that you are not alone on this anger management journey.
Key Takeaways:
- Admitting the need for help with anger is a courageous first step towards change.
- Anger management is a skill that can be learned, not a fixed trait.
- Many people struggle with anger because they lack a proven path to follow.
- Real change in anger management is possible with the right support and commitment.
- You can control your reactions and choices, which is where your true power lies.
Links referenced in this episode:
For more information (and FREE resources) of how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
For a FREE training on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com/training/.
To learn more about The Complete Anger Management System, visit angersecrets.com/course/.
Transcript
You know that moment after the outburst when the shouting stops but the silence feels even heavier.
Speaker A:Your partner won't meet your eyes, your child looks away, and inside you're replaying every word you wish you could take back.
Speaker A:Maybe you tell it's just who I am.
Speaker A:Or worse.
Speaker A:I've tried everything.
Speaker A:Nothing works.
Speaker A:But what if that isn't true?
Speaker A:If you're listening to this podcast, it means something powerful.
Speaker A:You haven't given up.
Speaker A:You have hope, and you think change is possible.
Speaker A:In this episode, I want to show you why that hope is not misplaced.
Speaker A:By the end of today's episode, you'll learn the truth about anger management and whether real change is still possible for you, even if you've struggled for years.
Speaker A:Hi there, I'm Alastair Deuce, and you're listening to episode 139 of the Anger Secrets podcast.
Speaker A:If you're new here, welcome.
Speaker A:And if you've been tuning in for a while, I'm really glad you're back.
Speaker A:For over 30 years, I've helped more than 15,000 people control their anger, master their emotions, and build relationships that actually feel good again.
Speaker A:If you want help right now to control your anger, including a free training on how to control your anger in just seven days, head over to my website angersecrets.com.
Speaker A:there's a link there to access that free training.
Speaker A:Or if you'd like to chat personally with me about your situation, you can also book a free 30 minute anger assessment call with me.
Speaker A:I look forward to talking with you.
Speaker A:With that said, let's dive into today's episode.
Speaker A:Can people really Change the Truth About Anger Management?
Speaker A:Let's start with something simple.
Speaker A:Admitting you need help with anger isn't easy.
Speaker A:In fact, just pressing play on this episode might have taken more courage than you think, because no one listens to anger management podcasts for fun.
Speaker A:I know you're here because you know it's time to face your anger.
Speaker A:And if that's you, I want to say I respect that facing anger issues is not easy, and I know that.
Speaker A:However, even though you've made your first important step to get help, you might also be thinking, this is just how I've always been.
Speaker A:I've tried to change, but it never sticks.
Speaker A:Or what's the point of trying?
Speaker A:Again, if this is you, you're not alone.
Speaker A:These thoughts are very common.
Speaker A:They're also incredibly limiting because in my experience, they usually come from one disappointment.
Speaker A:Perhaps you've tried to change before and maybe it didn't work, so now you assume the problem is you.
Speaker A:But that's not the case.
Speaker A:In truth, most people don't fail with anger management because of anything to do with themselves.
Speaker A:They fail because they've never been shown a simple, proven path that actually works.
Speaker A:And that's exactly why I started this podcast and why I created my course, the Complete Anger Management System.
Speaker A:Not just because I like talking about anger, which I do, but also to give you the tools, step by step, to finally get control of it.
Speaker A:Because here's the Anger management is a skill, not a personality trait.
Speaker A:And like any skill, it can be learned.
Speaker A:I've seen it happen not once, not twice, but thousands of times.
Speaker A:In fact, over the past 30 years, I've worked with parents who stopped yelling, partners who stopped fighting, professionals who went from tense and reactive to calm and respected.
Speaker A:These weren't bad people.
Speaker A:They were teachers, builders, accountants, engineers, business owners, people from every walk of life.
Speaker A:But like you, they had moments where things felt out of control.
Speaker A:Maybe their child threw a tantrum in the middle of dinner.
Speaker A:Maybe their partner said something that triggered them.
Speaker A:Maybe it was stress, exhaustion, pressure, or just one of those days.
Speaker A:And in that flash of emotion, everything exploded.
Speaker A:But what I've learned is reacting with anger is always a choice.
Speaker A:The problem is, most people don't realize they have this choice.
Speaker A:They haven't been taught how to access it in the heat of the moment.
Speaker A:That's what anger management training is really about.
Speaker A:Not suppressing anger, but learning how to navigate it.
Speaker A:Not becoming passive, but becoming powerful in a different way.
Speaker A:And the best part?
Speaker A:You don't need years of therapy.
Speaker A:You don't need to relive every traumatic memory or unpack your entire childhood.
Speaker A:What you need is a proven framework and someone who's walked hundreds of people through it.
Speaker A:And that's what I offer here on the podcast, and much more deeply inside my full course, the Complete Anger Management System.
Speaker A:If you want to explore that, just head to angussecrets.com but whether you choose to work with me or not, here's what I want you to Anger management programs do work.
Speaker A:This isn't just my opinion.
Speaker A:It's science.
Speaker A:For example, a recent study in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence found that men who completed a cognitive behavioural anger program showed significant improvements in anger control and major reductions in domestic violence.
Speaker A:Another study in the Journal of Behavior Research and Therapy showed that participants experienced less frequent and intense anger and were better able to think clearly in stressful situations.
Speaker A:And a third study, this one in the Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, found a clear drop in both physical and verbal aggression after program completion.
Speaker A:That's the data.
Speaker A:But honestly, what matters more to me is what I've seen in real life.
Speaker A:Relationships saved parents reconnecting with their kids.
Speaker A:People finally proud of how they handle themselves, even when life gets hard.
Speaker A:So if you're still wondering, can people really change?
Speaker A:Here's my answer.
Speaker A:After three decades in this work, yes, absolutely.
Speaker A:But only if they're willing to try something different.
Speaker A:And if you're here today listening, you've taken that first step.
Speaker A:Change isn't easy, and it doesn't happen overnight.
Speaker A:It's a path of small steps, setbacks, and victories.
Speaker A:But with commitment, support, and the courage to keep moving forward, transformation is possible.
Speaker A:And remember, you don't have to do it alone.
Speaker A:I'm here to walk this path with you.
Speaker A:Okay, that's it for today's episode.
Speaker A:Can People Really Change the Truth About Anger Management?
Speaker A:If this episode was helpful for you, hit that follow button and maybe leave a quick review.
Speaker A:It helps others find the podcast and it might be the exact nudge someone else needs right now.
Speaker A:And remember, if you want a free training on how to control your anger in seven days or a chance to chat one on one with me, just head over to angersecrets.com there's a free 30 minute call you can book.
Speaker A:No pressure, just a genuine conversation.
Speaker A:And if you're ready to get serious about changing how you show up in your relationship, take a look at the complete anger management system@AngerSecrets.com forward/course.
Speaker A:I'd love to help you control your anger once and for all.
Speaker A:And finally, remember, you can't control what other people say or do, but you can control yourself, your tone, your choices, and how you respond to others.
Speaker A:And that's where your real power lives.
Speaker A:Take care and I'll talk to you soon.
Speaker B:The Anger Secrets Podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of counseling, psychotherapy, or any other professional health service.
Speaker B:No therapeutic relationship is implied or created by this podcast.
Speaker B:If you have mental health concerns of any type, please seek out the help of a local mental health professional.
